Speaking Truth Into your Child’s Heart

I’m a big believer that you can speak truth into someone. This is why the words I speak to AND about my daughters play like a recording at the end of the day. There was a point where every day I would sigh and think to myself, “Why am I speaking that into my kid?” For example, The more I found myself saying, “My kiddo is so sassy.” the more sassy she became. If you talk to me at all about my kids you know that statement comes from my mouth more often than I’d like to admit.

When my oldest was one I had an idea. I would intentionally speak truth into her each day. I made the decision for two big reasons:

1. I wanted her to hear truths about herself everyday to help foster her own identity that wasn’t defined by society or another person. It would be defined by the way God sees her. The way her daddy and I see her. The way, I pray, that she one day sees herself.
2. I want her to form a definition of beauty that is directly tied to the way a person is on the inside. I know it’s so cliché but I feel it to be necessary to define it young. A part of me feels if she hears it everyday that I can help drown out other definitions that are thrown her way.

How exactly do I do this? Every night the last thing both my girls hear before they fall asleep are these things:

You are kind.

You are brave.

You are strong.

You are smart.

You are beautiful.

You are loved by God.

As my oldest gets older I am realizing these things will change to be tailored to her individual personality. Same goes for my youngest. For example, my oldest daughter is a leader but like every young leader she needs guidance on how to be a good one. Naturally, I added to her list.

You are encouraging.

I chose this one because she needed guidance on how to encourage her friends in a positive way. So viola!

It doesn’t stop there. In my eyes these truths need to be spoken to them more than once a day. They really need to see themselves do these things. What words do you think I use when Bug shares with a friend? if you guessed, “That was very kind.” you’d be right. What about when she apologizes to her class for disrupting nap time?  the response from us is “You’re so brave” What if she compliments a friend on something they are doing? my response, “You are so encouraging.” So in reality these words also give me guidance on how to respond positively to my daughter throughout the day.

Now before you go and think, ” How in the world does this mom do that all the time?” I’m going to stop you right there. I don’t. I’m human. I depend on Gods grace to get me through day because often my response comes out something like this:

“…………………………..”

Yes. That’s silence. I find myself NOT responding to those positive actions more often than I find myself responding to the negative actions. I know I’m not alone. I’m a mom which means I am permanently exhausted all the time. I miss things. Sometimes the negative outweigh the positive.

However, I want to raise Godly children who grow up to be good and do good. So I strive to do better each day. Which brings me back to the recording that plays at the end of each day. I play that recording and challenge myself to do better tomorrow. I look to be intentional in the truth I am speaking into my daughters. I look to Gods grace to save me from my shortcomings. And Lord knows I pray that I don’t screw it all up.